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Turning Point: Charlie Kirk took the bullet I deserved

I never considered myself a huge Charlie Kirk fan. Don’t get me wrong, I liked the guy and appreciated his work, and would occasionally watch his content when it popped up on the algorithm, but I never followed him on social media. So in a way, it’s strange how much I’ve been mourning the death of somebody I never knew. But after the initial shock, I understood why I was so crushed by the news, and why many others were as well.

Charlie Kirk represented people like me. But even more than that… he was among the best of us.

And if I’m being honest, I saw in Charlie Kirk a better man than me. I saw a man who didn’t give up hope, even through some dark times. I saw a happy warrior, someone with the courage to go straight to the battle of ideas with the wisdom. He had the emotional intelligence to not just defend his ideas, but to sway others to his side in a positive manner. In Charlie Kirk, I saw a man who emulated his Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, and though he probably made plenty of mistakes in his life, he looked to be much closer to Him than I certainly was.

Which is why the enemy, aka Satan (for he truly is the enemy of all of us), had him murdered.

A year ago, I was faced with a difficult choice. A choice that tested my faith… a test I failed miserably. It was pride month, and my office I was overseeing was tasked to put up a banner in honor of it. Though I have friends with people who consider themselves among the LGBT community and try to show love as best as possible to them, as a Christian man, I’m called not to take part in those activities. I’m called to take the narrow road and to make those hard decisions in obedience to God, even if it costs me friendships, money, or my job. During that time, I prepared myself to have a talk with management about it, telling them I needed to respectfully abstain from participating. But when it came time to meet, I cowered out. I didn’t bring it up, and ended up going along to get along. In ways, I acted like Peter when he denied Christ those three times before the rooster crow.

I’ve thought about that incident several times today, how I allowed that event to crush my spirits. And while I kept my head down and stayed out of the fight, people like Charlie Kirk put the team on their backs. He was out there battling when very few others would—when the rest of us had already given up. If Charlie were in my shoes, he wouldn’t have been a coward. He would’ve done the right thing, because it’s what he did his whole life.

And his reward? He doesn’t get to kiss his children goodnight ever again. He doesn’t get to watch them grow up. He doesn’t get to grow old with his wife and have the joy of seeing his grandchildren. Instead, he got a bullet.

And what eats at me more than anything about this, is that it’s a bullet I deserved, not him.

It’s that thought that has brought me to tears more than once today for a man I never met. I can only imagine it’s the same reason many men like me have also found themselves weeping. In Charlie’s short life, he inspired millions, changed minds on his campus travels, and built one of the most influential political organizations in the world. He was so influential, that it’s difficult not to compare him to another man who only made it to His early 30’s before he was murdered. A man who died the death we deserved! A man who lived the sinless life that we could not. A man who out of a love we did not deserve, took it upon Himself to take our sins and die the most excruciating death on the cross.

Now, if Charlie were alive today, I’d be willing to bet he would never compare himself to Christ. Yet, I can’t help but reflect on both their lives while feeling a weight of shame with my own. Shame that I haven’t shown the love, courage and obedience to my Lord and Savior that Charlie showed in his. Shame at how much I’ve squandered my talents while Charlie faithfully carried his out. And perhaps most shameful is through a grace I don’t deserve, I’m still here. Despite my failures and disobedience, I was able to eat dinner with my family tonight, pick my son up from the bus stop with my wife, and lay my daughter down to sleep, all things Charlie was deprived of through an utter act of evil.

Romans 8:28 states that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose,” a verse that reminds us that even through tragedy and evil deeds done to believers, God finds a way to use those events to ultimately glorify Him. And with that, I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Charlie’s organization was named Turning Point USA.

2,000 years ago when he saw the resurrected Christ, Peter turned from a coward, into a courageous man willing to die for his Lord and Savior, so much that when he was crucified for spreading the gospel, he requested to be done so upside down, stating he was not worthy of being crucified like Jesus. This too can be a turning point for us. This can be a time to reverse course, put down our idols and comforts, whether it be Netflix, Fox News, X, the NFL, or Call of Duty, and confront the evils around us to make our communities a better place for our families.

There is no doubt we live in dark times, and for millennials like me, we often reminisce about life in the 80s, 90s, and 2000s, wishing we could go back to simpler times, times when the world seemed so much more peaceful, and much more… easy. When those thoughts pop into my head, every now and then, I’m reminded of wise words told by a far wiser man than I could ever be:

We are put here on this Earth and at this time for a reason. And with that comes a great opportunity, for although the enemy may have killed Charlie Kirk, they did not kill His spirit, the same spirit that flowed through Charlie, a spirit I believe is flowing through many of us today. We have an opportunity to go out into the world, to honor and serve Him. To spread the gospel. We have an opportunity, like Charlie Kirk, to hear the words, “well done, good and faithful servant,” from our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

Let’s go forth and make a difference in this world. Let’s become the men and women we were called to be.

-GC

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Idolatry and the NFL – How Our Worship of Sports is Ruining the Experience

Taking a quick detour from my Greek adventures, as this has been blowing up on social media and been sort of eating at me.

There is a clip going around of a Packers fan (a young woman) being berated by an Eagles fan, or who I will term “bully” who proceeds to call her an ugly “See U Next Tuesday” if you get the reference.

***Warning, harsh language***

Lately, I haven’t been commenting on these types of things, for there seems to be plenty of that on twitter and other social media sites, but I came across a clip from Matt Walsh, who berated the woman’s fiancée for not “defending her honor.”

I usually appreciate Matt Walsh’s commentary, for I do believe there are many places in today’s society that require a no-nonsense approach to solving issues, and his deadpanned style of humor can actually not just be informative, but quite entertaining in some of his documentaries.  But one foible of his I’ve noticed is he seems to lack grace with men in certain issues, or at least that’s the perception he gives, when I think grace is required as we live in a fallen world.

Also, in this particular commentary, I think he misses the broader picture, something that’s an even greater plague on our society, which is the idolatry of this game that so many of us are wrapped up in.  And when I say “us,” I’m including myself, for I can be just as guilty as everybody else.

First, let’s talk about manliness and defending your honor.  Unfortunately, like he mentioned, the clip that’s shown doesn’t share the entire story.  There could’ve been an altercation between the two prior, and the guy filming could’ve had a few extra words to say after he stopped recording.  But  judging by the woman and the fact that she was sitting in front, it’s hard for me to believe she did anything egregious other than being a typical fan rooting for her team.  And let’s just assume the man recording left it at and didn’t say anything the rest of the game to him.  I’m tempted to say “I would’ve done this, or that…” but doing so would simply be Monday morning quarterbacking the situation, of which there’s already enough of that going on.

But the question remains, should he have gone and punched or physically assaulted the bully in the face and risked going to jail or the hospital?

I think it’s worth nothing that in these situations, we should make a distinction between being courageous and being stupid.  If you’re on a date and take a wrong turn down a street and suddenly, you’re surrounded by a group of dangerous robbers, one of whom insults your wife/fiancée/girlfriend.  Should your first reaction to attack him?  I would say no, for your duty is to get her out of harms away above teaching that guy a lesson and live to fight another day, of which attacking one of them would simply rope you in to doing exactly what they wanted you to do.

And though going to an NFL game is a little different, the concept still holds.  The woman and her fiancée were in a no win situation, surrounded by people of which were he to act as Matt suggested, he would be giving in to exactly what the bully wants, which is to create a situation where he could easily beat up a fan of the opposing team with little repercussions, with the excuse “he threw the first punch.”

But while people can debate whether or not the guy filming violated the man-code for not defending his fiancée’s honor, I think the better question is, “where were the other men?”  The bully was apparently with his two friends, whom were surrounded by several other people, of which more than half were also men, who sat around couldn’t care less as a woman was being called vile names?  Nobody had the gall to say, “hey bud, knock it off!”???  We can harp on the guy filming all we want, but when it comes down to it, he’s closer to powerless in this situation than we would like to believe, while being surrounded by people who actually have the authority to step in and correct the bully’s behavior.  And I’m not even suggesting physical confrontation, but imagine if another Philly fan went over to him and said something like, “before we are Packers fans or Eagles fans, we are human beings, and we don’t treat people like that!”  That guy probably would’ve been a bit humbled, maybe even apologized, and would probably still have a job, for it’s said that the company he works for has since terminated him as an employee.

I think if we take an honest look at ourselves as men, there are times where we’re in positions of authority for others who do not have that power, and at the risk of being uncomfortable, we simply do not act.  And I know at least for myself, I can do better.

But the broader issue at stake that is mostly ignored here is the idolatry of our sports teams.  And I get that there’s many forms of idolatry in this world, but I think it’s safe to say that the NFL, being as big as it is, is one form that has captured many of us.

I specifically remember taking my wife (then my girlfriend) to a Packers/Redskins game a few months after we started dating.  I did my usual routine of getting super excited, drinking a little too much, hooting and hollering and heckling Redskins fans and players, and overall acting like a fool, something I easily got away with as a single man (or more appropriately, a single boy).  The next day, she made it crystal clear that I would not be acting like that ever again.

And she was correct.  My behavior was childish, and looking back at how I acted as a fan in my 20’s and early 30’s, I’m a bit embarrassed to say the least.  The arrogance I displayed when my team won, the meltdowns I publicly had when they lost, and in my more “matured” response, I would talk as if my team was the center of my life, which is the definition of idolatry, and as a Christian man, I was breaking that commandment day in and day out.  Through marriage, having children, and also living outside the US for the last couple of years, I’ve thankfully been able to take a step back and not make football the center of my life.  But although I may not publicly display it, in my heart, there are times when those feelings of hatred and animosity towards rival teams’ surface, and there’s no good reason for it.

It’s this idolatry that causes people like the bully in the video to talk to that woman that way, because his sports team, “must be placed higher than anything else, and anything that gets in the way of this must be torn down, belittled, and shamed.”  It is literally the worship of a sports team, and being that the Eagles have only won one Super Bowl, it is worship that will let him down more often than not (as it will let down all of us, no matter what team we root for).  It’s forms of this idolatry that prevent people from doing the right thing, because doing so may make us uncomfortable and violate whatever the idol commands against, which in this case, includes diminishing the sacredness that comes with rooting for our team.

A point was also made that, “you should simply not take your fiancée to an Eagles game period.”  And to a certain extent, I get that, for I probably wouldn’t take my son to an NFL game until he’s near adulthood for that reason.  But how sad is that, that we’re starting to collectively accept that a professional sports game is no place to bring your family?  I can remember how special it was as a kid when my mom and dad took us to a Mariners game and getting to see Ken Griffey Jr. hit a home run.  And now as an adult, I feel that I won’t be able to give that experience to my children because some adults may ruin it, again, all for the sake of idolatry?  And imagine if we held this standard all the way?  “Oh, we can’t go to Billy’s high-school football tonight because he’s playing an away game, and the fans say disgusting things to our wives and children…”  That would not be tolerated on that level, and the same should go for the professional level as well.

I’ve heard Philly has a reputation, as seen by this video of a Viking’s fan (and mind you, that I am certainly no fan of the Vikings), which I would hope the leadership in the Eagles organization and the NFL would make strides to correct this, for it’s making ordinary people akin to rabid animals in the wild.

Again, language warning

But even if it doesn’t exist to this extent with other NFL franchises, other forms of idolatry still do.  We let these teams control our emotions, our behavior, how our weeks, months, and years will go, and we act like it’s the center of the universe.  I say, let’s try to find something else to put front and center, my recommendation being Jesus Christ.  And I get that not everybody is a Christian like me, but there are certainly other things we can put before football in our lives, our family and friends being one.

Until we do that, football, and sports in general, will continue to become less and less enjoyable to watch, both for the bullies and the innocent among us.

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Kanye Represents the Spiritual Struggle Within All of Us

Anybody who knows me knows that I’ve been a huge fan of Kanye West for a long time.  His “My beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy” is a masterpiece of an album, possibly my all-time favorite outside of Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side of the Moon,” and for the most part, I like his brash, no-filtered style.  In a world of celebrities where everything seems so fake, it’s actually refreshing to hear somebody say exactly what’s on their mind, no matter how outrageous it may be.

With all that said, his behavior as of late has been disheartening to say the least.  The culmination of events that has led to his most recent “I like Hitler” statement has been excruciating to watch.  There were many to quickly condemn him, and others who blame his episodes on mental health.  And while that may be a part of it, I believe his struggles are much deeper than that.

Whether we’re aware of it or not, Kanye, like the rest of us, is caught in the middle of spiritual warfare.  And sadly, I fear he’s losing the battle right now.

The word Israel literally means, “to struggle with God,” as told in Genesis chapter 32 where Jacob literally wrestles with an angel for an entire night.  At the break of dawn, the angel finally lets him free, changing his name from Jacob to Israel, of which Jacob’s 12 sons would eventually represent the 12 tribes of Israel.  And how fitting a name that would be, not just for Israel, but for all of humanity.

Throughout history, you see this struggle play out.  Moses led the Exodus from Egypt, paving the way for a great Kingdom under King David, only for the Jewish people to lose their way and eventually fall to the Babylonians.  There’s a similar story with the Christians Crusaders leading to the Dark Ages.  Today, we’re watching this struggle not only play out on a macro level with our country, but on a micro level in our individual lives.

And unfortunately for Kanye, the curse of stardom means that his struggles are out in the open for all of us to see.

For a long time, Kanye was doing exactly what the devil had planned for him.  As he gained popularity, his music became cruder, with songs that included a vulgar rant about how “Yeezy taught,” a woman how to perform incredible sex, to even referring to himself as “Yeezus” in a direct afront to God.  The devil was more than happy taking this talented rapper/producer further away from “Jesus Walks,” and more towards “I am a God,” and he was rewarding him with all the material treasures of this world.  He received the most desired woman in the world as a wife, he had become extremely wealthy, and his influence was only growing, even reaching people like me who, like Kanye, had strayed from their spiritual upbringing.

But then, something happened.  Something that wasn’t in the devil’s plans.  No, it wasn’t Kanye putting on the red hat (though I’m sure that wasn’t in his plan’s either).  He did something far more treacherous, far more betraying…

He declared his allegiance to Jesus.  And he did so with a bang.

His album “Jesus is King,” debuted at number 1, and the titular song, “Selah” was a loud and proud tribute to the glory of God.  This boisterous rapper was now using his powerful influence and far-reaching voice to not only praise and honor God but deliver His message and make converts out of those lost souls.

This looked like a positive turnaround for the accomplished rapper, but like all of us, he is a fallen creature in this sinful world.  And his figurative chickens were about to come home to roost, leaving us with several lessons.

1. You cannot serve two masters.

Kanye, like many of us, claims to serve the Lord.  And while we mean well by it, we often fall short of that claim, for we have our faults, our idols, and our weaknesses that prevent us from committing our full service to Him.  It’s why Jesus said it’s easier for a man to go through the eye of a needle than for a wealthy man to get into heaven.  Although Kanye was vigorous in his faith for God, he believed, like many of us foolishly do, that he could work that into the secular empire he had emersed himself in, one who’s worldview was in complete contradiction with the Christian worldview.  Sooner or later, something had to give.

Is Kanye’s love for Jesus greater than his love for fame, wealth, influence, and most of all, his ego?  Only him and God know the answer to that question.  But it’s a question all of us need to ask ourselves.  We may not have what Kanye has in terms of material things, but we all struggle with those worldly desires that we just don’t want to give up, from the lonely single man addicted to porn to the church pastor who’s more concerned about retaining the size of his congregation over preaching the true word of God.  And how many of us wake up on Sunday morning thinking about how our favorite NFL team is going to do vs. how we’re going to honor our Lord and Savior on the Sabbath?  I’ll be the first to admit I’ve been guilty of that sin many times.

I hope Kanye can eventually get to that point.  I hope we all get to that point.  However, to do so, we must surrender those vices and temptations that have control over us so we can fully serve the one true God.  However, the enemy does not give up that easy, which brings me to the second lesson…

2. Never underestimate your enemy.

Kanye West is a gifted individual.  By watching his documentary “Jeen-yus,” you see how the combination of talent and relentless drive and determination propelled his career to become one of the most influential rappers of our generation, despite several roadblocks and powerful people in the industry not giving him a chance.  The same qualities that made him such a success also generated many of the flaws we see in him, of which Satan has his own drive and determination to exploit.  Not only is he cunning and relentless with this exploitation but has no problem leaving a path of destruction in his way.  As Christians, it’s important to understand this, for we all have our weaknesses that we must actively combat.

His Christian faith clashed with the hedonistic lifestyle that comes with the Kardashian name, and it was only a matter of time before his marriage would fall apart.  And that’s when the attacks really began to ramp up.  He was provoked by an individual of whom I’m actually starting to believe is involved in satanic worship (but that’s another story for another day).  Immediately after their separation, this man started sleeping with his wife, even going as far as tattooing the name of his children on his body.  Something like this would drive anybody mad.  Mix in a diagnosed bi-polar disorder, and it’s a recipe for disaster, as was apparent all over social media.

The downward spiral into self-destruction continued.  He began receiving threats of physical harm, threats of never seeing his kids again, and even threats of losing his wealth, the last of which came to fruition on some level.  Each time he responded, the situation only seemed to get worse.  I can understand the indignation, for any righteous person would, and frankly should have some level of anger if ever they were to receive the type of attacks Kanye faced.  But Satan was in control of the situation, and the more the saga went on, the more Kanye relied on his ego, fame, and influence to combat him instead of relying on God’s guidance. 

3. We all need good, spiritual guidance to develop spiritual maturity.

When you listen to Kanye talk, he speaks as if he’s ready to be a general in God’s army, when in reality he barely just finished his first tour of combat and lacks the maturity to lead an army into a battle of such magnitude.  He is in severe need of spiritual guidance, of which I don’t think he’s getting much of.  Right now, he’s being heavily influence by a man named Nick Fuentes, which admittedly, I know very little about.  A quick internet search pretty much makes him synonymous with “white supremacist,” a term so broadly and overly used these days to describe anybody with differing views that it’s pretty much been rendered meaningless to me.  Regardless of what his racial views are, it’s apparent that he’s taking advantage of Kanye right now, acting as an enabler to his addiction to fame.  Each time Kanye needs his fix, Mr. Fuentes is there to deliver the goods with another podcast appearance, with each hit costing him nothing but a small a piece of his soul for payment.  Sooner or later though, he’ll have nothing left to give, while the dealer will simply move onto the next unfortunate soul.

Kanye is not alone in his need for spiritual mentorship, somebody to guide us on a personal level on our walk as Christians.  Sadly, I think that’s something lacking in our churches, and whatever leadership it provides often hasn’t been sufficient to prepare us for spiritual warfare.

In other words, Joel Osteen’s prosperity gospel isn’t going to cut it anymore, at least not in this culture.  Being a Christian isn’t an easy task.  It isn’t “believe in Jesus and all your problems go away.”  It takes hard work and discipline to follow to 10 Commandments, to not give into temptation, to free yourself of the material desires this world brings and commit yourself to serving Jesus.  And with the trajectory we’re on, it’s only going to get harder in the coming days.  Thus, if we are to truly live out our lives as the Christians we claim to be, it’s imperative we surround ourselves with righteous individuals and seek the council of elders who have walked this life and can provide the wisdom to endure.

It’s heartbreaking watching somebody get used, abused, and fall the way Kanye West has, especially considering how vocal he’s been with his faith as of late.  Not only is it heartbreaking, but terrifying.  It’s terrifying because his decent into darkness is something that can not only happen to us, but most likely has happened to us in some point in our lives.  On some level, we’ve given into temptations, disobeyed our Lord, and paid a steep price for it, and will eventually pay the steepest price of all… death.  And seeing Kanye with a mask over his face, a symbol of hopelessness, and saying the things he said is a stark and dark reminder of how serious the struggle, the same one Jacob had many millennia ago, really is.

Except that mask isn’t our symbol, and it doesn’t have to be Kanye’s either.  Our symbol is the cross, the symbol of hope, the reminder how Jesus walked the Earth as a man, facing the same emotions, the same struggles as all of us.  In fact, his struggles were greater than ours, considering how he was given the task of sacrificing and placing upon himself the entire sin of humanity.  He struggled so much so that at one point he actually began to sweat blood, and the last time I checked, I don’t recall anybody so stressed out that they literally sweat blood.

But as a man, he answered that call.  He was beaten, tortured, mocked, humiliated, and eventually nailed to a cross to die.  And at the end of it all, after his friends—his disciples had abandoned all hope, he rose from the grave, conquering death, and conquering Satan once and for all.  Not only did He set the example to how to live your life, but He saved us from the eternal damnation we all deserve, and that includes Mr. Kanye West.

I hope that Kanye remembers this, and I pray he receives the spiritual guidance he desperately needs; not just for his sake, but for everyone else’s as well, for all of us need that same spiritual guidance during these times.

Photo by Yannick Pulver on Unsplash
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