September 29th, 2022
Mikey… Mikey, Mikey, Mikey…
I can hear it now. “Now that Rich is gone, I won’t ever have to put up with that Zack guy ever again! Thank you Lord!”
Well, not so fast, heheh. I’m here to stay, at least for a little while longer, and now, the torch has been passed on! You’re the man now!
We went to this place called Mykonos for the wife’s birthday almost two weekends ago, and boy was it expensive! 5 bucks for a bottle of water at the restaurant! I was like, “Are you kidding me?!?!” Picking a restaurant felt like we were playing Russian Roulette, and if you picked the wrong one, boy oh boy were you going to pay the price!
BUT… there’s always a diamond in the rough, and I found just the store. I knew I had struck gold when a bottle of Mountain Dew was only a dollar. And believe me, Mountain Dew over here is like finding caviar back home. You just don’t go to a store and find yourself Mountain Dew. In fact, you’re lucky if you can get it on the black market! So believe me, I got my fill and then some, and I certainly showed my appreciation to the cashier. “You guys have been so good to me… Yes, I’m really enjoying the island. And wouldn’t you know it, it’s my wife’s birthday today! Oh, thank you. You know I have to treat her well. Say, do you have any champagne…? You do? That’s great! Let me get a bottle for her. She deserves the very best. Which one do you recommend? The Moet Rose? Sure, let’s try it out. Nothing is off limits on this day… WHAT THE??? 87 DOLLARS????!!!!!
Mike, I’ll tell ya, I really stepped in it this time. I couldn’t take it back at this point. Heck, I’d look like such a cheapskate! And what would Rich think if he ever found out? You know I wouldn’t hear the end of it from him! So, I bit the bullet and got her an 87 dollar bottle of champagne on top of her manicure, pedicure, and deep massage day. The things we do for our wives… I just hope the good Lord remembers all those good deeds in the end.
It was a beautiful island though, but too many youngsters for an old fart like me. All these girls were walking around with their cellphones in the air, trying to take these things called, “selfies” for that Instagram app. Mike, let me tell ya, they were everywhere! Even the mom’s were doing it! It was ridiculous! And many of them were hardly wearing any clothes at all! It’s like I can’t take my son anywhere around this place!
Regardless of the depths these kids went to remove all forms of decency, I didn’t let that get in the way of taking some good pics, but not of me though! You know I’m not into that garbage! Well, maybe I do a little, but I strictly do it for my fans, and that’s it! And just between you and me, I was able to snap a few pics of pics of the little guy, and I’m not even braggin’ when I say I got one good-looking boy! Look out for him on the cover of GQ someday! And don’t worry, I’m going to make sure he grows up with good values, so you don’t have to worry about him being around the grandchildren or anything. He’s a heartthrob, and he may break some hearts, but never on purpose!
Well, in other news, it sounds like my free time just became non-existent, for now, I’m officially an employee at the US Embassy in Athens, Greece! Not too bad for a dingus like me! That being said, I got a lot of work to do, but don’t worry, I’ll still find ways to keep you updated on my adventures. But wouldn’t you know, it, my first week on the job, and I’m already sick! Bad timing if you ask me, and you know me. Any other time, I’d power right through it, but ever since this COVID thing, I ain’t coming around, even if it is only a mild cold! No way am I going to be that guy on my first week! But hopefully, it passes quickly and I can get back on track.
Until then, you know the drill. Tell everybody I say hi, and feel free to pass this along to our old friend Rich. I’m sure he misses us just as much as Jerry Jones misses all that money he gave Dak Prescott just to watch him get hurt again
And whatever you do, don’t let the turkey’s get you down!
November 1st, 2022 – Meteora
Mikey, I just had to email you about this last place I was at. Man oh man was it awesome!
They call it Meteora, because there’s a bunch of tall rocks and when it’s cloudy, it sort of looks like meteors up there, but get this. Back in the day when the Ottoman Empire was in charge, there was a bunch of Christian Monks who dug themselves little caves to hide from them. Why, because apparently, the Turks were a bunch of jerks, that’s why! So they would stay in these caves for like days and weeks, and I think there were a few people in the town that felt sorry for them, so they would send them bread and water and all that.
Well, eventually, a few of them got together and decided to build some monasteries up on the rocks, and who could blame them? Living in a monastery with other people and beds beats living in a cave any day! How they did it? Beats me, but in the end, they built like seven of them.
So the years go back, and people are like, “Meteor-a-what? Big whoop!” But then, James Bond goes there in one of his movies, and boom, the place is popping again!
And I gotta say, the place did not disappoint! It’s no wonder Bond went there! I haven’t felt this much at peace since the last time I had a McRib in my mouth, which has been awhile now since they don’t sell McRibs in Greece. And boy, that was in 2020… Who knows when the next time I’ll be able to taste one of those is?
I mean, I could talk about it, how it’s nice and quiet and they all have nice kept garden areas, and then there’s the views! I suppose you better just see for yourself!
The only downside is that you’d have to go without seeing babes for a while, which, for a guy like Rich, would be a tough lifestyle to acclimate to. But babes or no babes, getting to hang out up there in peace and everything doesn’t seem like a bad gig if you ask me. And just for my short time, there, I’m already in a better mood this week! So good, that I had a few jokes to crack about some of the guys back there, but in the interest of the monks of Meteora, I’m going to refrain! That’s how good I feel!
I gotta say, so far, I think this could actually be one of my favorite places over here!
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