June 30th, 2023 – I guess I need to go on a diet…

Magic Mike,

There’s always something… I don’t know why.  I mean, look at me?  Am I the type of person that causes a lot of drama?  I don’t think so.  But apparently, the people in our lives just like to stir the pot, whether it’s Russia and Ukraine, or Rich talking trash about your Eagles.  It’s unavoidable.

Take my buddy Kostas for example.  I get back from about a month or so of training back in the States.  It was a nice trip and I got to spend some quality time back home.  And being that I had a little per diem, ok, so I went out to eat a few times and indulged in some of my favorite dishes.  And conveniently enough, there was a McDonalds right down the street from my hotel, so sue me, I had a couple quarter pounders when I was back home.  Big deal!

Anyways, I step in the office on my first day back, and Kostas has the gall to question me about my weight.  And you’d think somebody would have the decency to address the topic in a sensitive way, especially in our day and age.  But nooooooooooo, not Kostas.  There was not subtleness to his approach.  He looked at me, threw his hands up in the air, shot me a look of disgust and said, “Dude, what’s the matter with you?  You’re fat!!”

Let me tell ya Mike, these Greeks, I love em’ to death, but they don’t beat around the bush.

So, now I’m running a little more and trying to watch what I eat, thanks to the father of all taki boys, Kostas.  And despite the barrage of insults I’m receiving over my body, I at least have one thing going in my favor.

Every Friday outside my house, we have a farmer’s market, or as they call, a “Laiki”.  And I’m not going to lie to you Mike, it’s pretty awesome.  I step out of my house and I can get any kind of fruit or vegetable I want.  Onions, potatoes, lettuce, eggs, strawberries, peaches, apples, oranges, you name it, they have it!  Oh, and they even have an olive guy who will sell me a kilo of Kalamata olives for around 5 or 6 bucks.  Imagine coming home with a kilo of olives from Whole Foods… talk about a king’s ransom!  Not here though.  Walk down the street with 20 euros in your pocket you’re literally treated as one!

But as good as they treat me, I’m nothing compared to the little man.  Mike, I’m tellin’ ya, he pretty much gets the celebrity treatment every time we walk out the door.  The women are always giving him blessings, and the younger ones are blowing him kisses and waving to him, and anything he wants, he gets!  A banana here, a cucumber there, and the broccoli guy’s always hooking us up with a couple extra carrots or a head of cabbage.  And the potato guy… well, he got a little too weird and too touchy for our liking, so we don’t go around him any longer.  But the rest of them, they’re all right.

We got to take another trip to the island Paros recently too… before I got, as the Greeks and Kostas would say, “Lipos.”  I mean, it was a nice getaway and all, but a lot of the islands are starting to look the same.  Which hey, I’m not complaining, as long as they have restaurants like these on them!

I’ll take a weekend on a Greek island any day, especially if it gives me a respite from the humiliation I receive from Kostas!

-Zack

August 5th, 2023 – The Gerald Ford Comes to Town

Magic Mike, 

I know, it’s been a while since I’ve given you a life update, and you’re probably thinking, “man oh man, that Zack guy finally forgot about us…”  Well, that’s far from the truth, for it turns out, I’ve been pretty busy these last couple of months, with trips, trainings, and visits.  Speaking of visits, guess who made a stop into Greece…

That’s right, the ol’ Gerald Ford came in.  So of course I had to pay my respects.

I can’t lie, it felt pretty cool rolling up there with my colleagues all enamored by such a beautiful war machine.  While I got to sit back and be all, “yea, I worked on that thing.”  But in all seriousness, that was quite the sight to see knowing all the blood sweat and tears that went into getting this thing deployed. And this was maybe the best part!

That’s right, that’s the system I worked on!  Unfortunately, they wouldn’t turn it on for me.  “But this was my baby!  C’mon, you can trust me…” but the good people of the CVN 78 politely ushered me along, and I couldn’t help but respect the courtesy and attitude.  I made sure to get me a ship coin or two, and I was even able to get my hands on the Chief’s Mess coin as well.  However, that one I gave to a former chief who works at the embassy.  He didn’t have the chance to get to visit, so it was the least I could do.

And although that’s some pretty good news, I have something that even tops that.  Check this out!

Looks like we’re going to have another little Zack running around in the next couple of months!  And this time, it’s a girl!  I’ll tell ya Mike, I’m excited for her, but now it’s got me thinking, with all those good looking cats in the world, you know, the smooth talkers like Rich in his younger days that all the ladies go crazy over, I’m a little worried.  I’m gonna have to start doing some more pushups and getting rid of this dad-bod I have, cause there ain’t no way I’m going let any of those turkey’s near my daughter unless they’re a straight-up good citizen of the world.  I’m talking they better know the bible front to back, clean cut, no tattoos, and when they go out, they better bring her back home by 8 PM by the latest, because if it’s a second later, oh boy, it’s game over!  It’ll be a trip to Uncle Rich’s for a good ol’ Cowboy’s butt whippin! 

Speaking of our friend Rich, he sent me some pictures of the 05V baseball outing where the Nats took on the Rockies!  It was nice seeing him reunited with the good folks of NAVSEA, but something wasn’t quite right however.  When I looked at the pictures, a few people were missing.  “…wait, where’s Mike?”  I said to myself.  “And Tara?  Not even Marquetta was there to see him???”  Mike, I know you probably see me as a nag, but you know how sensitive Rich is.  And seeing him there without his best buds by his side, he must’ve been heartbroken, for you sure as heck know I was.  I’ll tell you what, though.  I think if you go over to his house and offer him a hug, that’ll patch things right up.  And if you want to make it a slam dunk, you should bake him an apple pie.  Now that I think of it, it also wouldn’t hurt to bring him over a fruit basket, complimented with a nice wine.  I’m thinking a Chardonnay for the summer season.  Oh, and you’ve got hook him up with some of that prime rib they have at Harris Teeter.  Boy, oh boy, that hits the spot!  And a baked ziti??? Talk about icing on the cake!  Ohhh, cake, don’t forget that.  Carrot or red velvet, but I’d stay away from the cheesecake, you know, for the calories.  And while you’re at the store, a little bit of roast beef wouldn’t hurt.  Probably a pound/pound and a half would suffice.  Of course, don’t forget the chips, a nice tub of Fage Greek Yogurt, and some Kraft Macaroni and Cheese… you know, for the grandkids!  Throw in a few pastries and a couple Pilsners to share between two friends, and I think you’ll be alright.  And now that I think of it, I heard they have one of those really nice Nacho Cheese dispensing machines at Costco.  You bring him one of those along with the above, and you guys would have a party.  If he doesn’t forgive you after that, then I don’t know what will…

Just don’t forget, we’re all counting on you.  Rich is counting on you, so no pressure or anything, but don’t let us down! 

Well, as always, please send the good folk back in the office my very best, and let them know I miss them.  And don’t be shy about updates from your side either!  It’s always good to hear from you.  Until next time, Ya Sas, Opa, and Go Pack Go!!!

V/r, 

-Zack

Part 9: Fall 2023